car seat battles

my two year old is a happy little man, an easy going and cheerful chap that is so hilarious and charismatic that he charms everyone he meets.  but this is not always the case. oh no.

we have bedtime battles, sippy cup battles, car seat battles and hold my hand while we cross the road battles. not often. but they do happen. and my little happy chappy turns into a teenager. strong willed. passionate and determined.

a battle of wills will usually commence.

until one day i decided to wait.

it was raining, it was nap time, we were in the car. he managed to take his arms out of his straps. i asked him to put them back in or we would have to pull over.
he said no.
i pulled over. i asked him again.
he said no.
i leaned back and offered to do it for him.
no.
he cried.
he wrestled and he stood his ground.
now, i know why he was doing this. he was incredibly tired. overtired. he wanted to sleep. but he didn't want to be in his car seat. he wanted his cot. not an option in the middle of nowhere.
i tried everything i could think of to make him put his arms back in the straps so we could get moving and he could nap. i even tried to {gently} force his arms in myself. he is strong.
so i sat back in my seat and said ~
'i know you are having a hard time getting comfy in your seat for naptime, when you feel ready, just let me know and we can get going again. we cant drive if you don't have your arms in the safety straps'

and i sat... i am pretty impatient, so this was hard... it was a good ten minutes until he calmed down. but he did and he put his arms in the straps himself and said ~ 'i'm ready now mummy'. i drove off and within a minute he was sound asleep.

i should add... we no longer have seat belt battles.

chaos and contingency plans

months and months have passed, night after night of walking the floor with my wee man, long snoozy hours of night feeds and web browsing under the covers... i have been thinking alot about my children, a lot about how i parent them and even more about the effect i have on them and their futures.  it's a big thought.

i have been so tired, so so tired.  i love the sleepy dark feeds and the tiny fingers reaching up to my face.  i love the small sighs and snuffles of a sleeping child.  i am torn between cherishing every moment with them and the need to be me again.

in an attempt to gain some sort of control over things, i have been sleep training - i even hate using the words, but i just needed to get some sleep... or at least more than 2 hours in a row.  it's working, we got 9 hours last night! ahhhh the feeling of waking naturally and hearing a sleeping baby stirring across the room.  now after plenty of well meaning advice and tips we took the road less travelled - the gentle way.  there was no cry it out or controlled crying and there was no leaving him to figure it out on his own.  i mean how could we? this little guy spent 9 months being rocked to sleep in my tummy and another 5 being held, fed or carried to sleep - we could hardly just switch it on him. so we remained respectful and present, we helped him learn to fall asleep all by himself... it was hard... oh was it hard. and it still is. but it has been worth it - 40 minute naps to one and a half hours AND waking every hour and a half at night to sleeping 7-9 hours at a stretch.  how amazing our little boy is, so amazing.

i try to do this with poppy, who turned three last month... three.  how the time has flown. it is totally okay to cry, it's okay if mum and dad cries - and oh does mum cry! and it's okay to feel emotions, it's okay.
toddlers are at a tricky stage of their lives, so many emotions, so many feelings and not enough words or understanding to express them.
feeling as tired as i have and as frustrated at my chaotic life at the moment, i have been reallly struggling to keep all this in mind.  i have shouted and i have lost my patience... far too often.  but we snuggle up at night and we talk... we go over what happened that day (good or bad) and we help each other understand it all. no matter what we are all here for each other... when the going gets tough... 

being a parent is hard.  it is worth it but it is so, so hard.

sleep thiefs

so it has been a while since i blogged anything and this is primarily due to the fact that there are not enough hours in the day... not if i want to sleep anyway!  a newborn is tiring, yes. a newborn who snacks every 2 hours or so and a feisty toddler is... well... it's... hard work! but so great at the same time!

i feel incredibly overwhelmed sometimes - mostly at how relentless it all is! but also at how blessed i am... we are. i mean these little folk are just amazing, adorable, gorgeous and so so precious. blub blub. post pregnancy hormones. check.

i do really love the little sleep stealing monsters.

so just a short post to check in - with myself more than anything.

i have been going craft crazy lately so will post more about that soon...

one toddler and one (not so) teeny tiny baby

well, here he is... baby number two... fergus.

i cant believe how much i love him already - although i should have already been aware of this from baby number one... poppy.  oh how i loved her from the moment i saw her!

he is so like her but yet so different... they look the same when i look back at photos of poppy but he is very much a boy and with finer features. he is so laid back... so far. and she was so cross all the time!

poppy has really taken to the wee guy (as she calls him) and is loving helping out with bath time and nappy changes.  i feel privileged to have such an amazing and caring little girl as poppy - to see how she has adapted to his arrival and how she is coping so well, makes me so proud!  she has her moments of course, and the toilet training has gone to pot (so to speak!) but that was all expected and anticipated well in advance. we are working through it together - with the help of some stickers and a potty train! ha! the reward chart... one thing i thought i would never do. needs must.

so how did fergus arrive into this world... quickly! i am all emotional about how amazing the birth was after having such a tough time of it first time round.  poppy took days to come, i only managed to stay in the pool for a few hours and ended up being induced, having my waters broken and getting an epidural... this time it was over in only five hours (from the first contraction) he was born in the water using a bit of gas and air and homeopathy. he did get stuck a bit as he was a whopping 9lbs 9oz... but the water made it all so bearable and relaxed. there was a moment, just before i started pushing, where i thought i couldnt do it, that i wanted to go to labour ward and get any drugs going. but i did it and am overwhelmed and proud of myself and of fergus...and of sam, my husband, who helped me though it.

so, now the adventure begins.  mamma of two.

cotton wool, one knitted square and some thread.

ahhhh, i just had to share this amazingly simple and gorgeous crafty find of mine...

oh so lovely!

and here is one of the little critters, hanging out for some snack -

i decided to make these late one night as i have a huge - and i mean huge - stash of knitted squares.  you see, i have been patch working them together to make a cosy blanket for number two arriving in a few months. so wandering what to do with all these extra squares, i immediately took to google.

adding my own take on the little fellas, i added some lavender to the stuffing - my trademark scent... i am sure i use more lavender than is really necessary!
i think these would make a lovely new baby gift - must remember to post about my home made lavender baby powder that was last years new baby gift!

during my internet trawlings i found so many lovely crafty creations that my next project has to be some amigurumi... but first i have to learn to crochet!

we have baby number two on the way and at almost the half way mark i am starting to think about how our lives are about to change.  ok, so you have one child, what difference will another make? well, A LOT! two little people to get ready in the morning, two little people to coax along on our morning walk with the dog, two little people to convince to go to bed... TWO.

when i got pregnant i think i had clearly forgotten what having a newborn was like... lack of sleep, continual feeds and nappy changes... watching poppy playing and seeing the amazing little person that she has become, always reminds me that it is all worth it... totally and completely.

and was it all that bad? or did i just feel so overwhelmed by this new life that everything seemed so hard? maybe this time around (safe in the knowledge that the two hourly feeds will turn into three hourly and four hourly... and that the night waking does end) i can enjoy it more, make the most of each day and cherish it. maybe this time around i wont be so hung up on 'doing it right'.

or maybe i will, after all, i am a mother now... will we ever feel that what we do for our children is enough?