it's been a while...

it has been months since i sat down and wrote anything, far less published it.  i guess i kind of lost the momentum of taking time to put things down... i lost the urge to take the time for me.

so, with a quiet house and a cosy blanket on my knees, i am finally getting back into it...

what have i been doing with my time? it's actually pretty hard to say {as most stay at home/work at home mums can often be heard muttering} i go about my daily routine {or lack of it}

we get up
we play
we eat breakfast
i clear up, put a wash on {or not}
get dressed {or not}
get the 2yr old and the almost 5yr old out of the door to walk the dog
make it as far as the end of the park
walk back
lunch
nursery run
2yr old takes a nap
housework/work on the computer/make telephone calls/watch mind numbing daytime tv {delete as appropriate}
2yr old wakes up
nursery run
tea
play for a bit
bath or a bit more playing
stories... lots and lots of stories
bed for small people
tv/computer/tidy up
bed for adults

you see... not much... but yet so much.

rainbow intestines and jelly worms

so for a bit of halloween fun, we had some messy play at the playgroup i run.  i boiled up some spaghetti and added food colouring to portions once i had drained and washed the pasta. i then added them all together into bowls and hid some creepy creatures in the pile of rainbow intestines!  for snack i made banana smoothies {basically just milk and bananas!} and i filled straws with jelly {gelatin and fruit juice mix} let it set then gently warmed the straws to release the worms!

we also had mini pumpkins {satusumas} and ghosts {more bananas with raisin eyes!}

it was a lot of fun :)

halloween always brings out the big kid in me...

dolls house... to be continued!

i am starting a work in progress blog post... about my daughters dolls house! it was her 'most favouritist' christmas present and we decided that as soon as the weather improves we would all decorate it together. cripes. i can hardly wait!

so this is the dolls house as it is -

i have found so many inspirational projects online but must be mindful not to make this about me! i am pretty sure poppy is going to have a ball decorating this house and i must detach myself and relax enough not to get all control-y! hmmm, unless i do it when she is in bed as a surprise for her!?!? eek.

early nights and crafty creations

i have been beavering away since my evenings have been drawing out... all thanks to my perfect little man who has learnt to fall asleep all by himself.  such a clever boy.

i decided to make him a sleep inducing cot mobile of hypnotic slow twisting and turning images filled with lavender...  this is it. i love it.

he loves it too.  he gazes at it as he falls asleep and chats and laughs away with his new owl friends when he wakes in the morning.  how much do i love the sound of a baby laughing? very much.

so i decided to sell them... i really need to perfect my sewing skills a bit and perhaps tweak bits here and there but i think lots of little newborn boys and girls would be fascinated by the bold black and white owls and the colourful patterns.

hope you like my new shop :)  etsy

it went down a treat with my not so wee girl too... she loved watching them... but then she loves owls! so for her birthday, i made her a plush version (also with toddler calming lavender)

chaos and contingency plans

months and months have passed, night after night of walking the floor with my wee man, long snoozy hours of night feeds and web browsing under the covers... i have been thinking alot about my children, a lot about how i parent them and even more about the effect i have on them and their futures.  it's a big thought.

i have been so tired, so so tired.  i love the sleepy dark feeds and the tiny fingers reaching up to my face.  i love the small sighs and snuffles of a sleeping child.  i am torn between cherishing every moment with them and the need to be me again.

in an attempt to gain some sort of control over things, i have been sleep training - i even hate using the words, but i just needed to get some sleep... or at least more than 2 hours in a row.  it's working, we got 9 hours last night! ahhhh the feeling of waking naturally and hearing a sleeping baby stirring across the room.  now after plenty of well meaning advice and tips we took the road less travelled - the gentle way.  there was no cry it out or controlled crying and there was no leaving him to figure it out on his own.  i mean how could we? this little guy spent 9 months being rocked to sleep in my tummy and another 5 being held, fed or carried to sleep - we could hardly just switch it on him. so we remained respectful and present, we helped him learn to fall asleep all by himself... it was hard... oh was it hard. and it still is. but it has been worth it - 40 minute naps to one and a half hours AND waking every hour and a half at night to sleeping 7-9 hours at a stretch.  how amazing our little boy is, so amazing.

i try to do this with poppy, who turned three last month... three.  how the time has flown. it is totally okay to cry, it's okay if mum and dad cries - and oh does mum cry! and it's okay to feel emotions, it's okay.
toddlers are at a tricky stage of their lives, so many emotions, so many feelings and not enough words or understanding to express them.
feeling as tired as i have and as frustrated at my chaotic life at the moment, i have been reallly struggling to keep all this in mind.  i have shouted and i have lost my patience... far too often.  but we snuggle up at night and we talk... we go over what happened that day (good or bad) and we help each other understand it all. no matter what we are all here for each other... when the going gets tough... 

being a parent is hard.  it is worth it but it is so, so hard.

cotton wool, one knitted square and some thread.

ahhhh, i just had to share this amazingly simple and gorgeous crafty find of mine...

oh so lovely!

and here is one of the little critters, hanging out for some snack -

i decided to make these late one night as i have a huge - and i mean huge - stash of knitted squares.  you see, i have been patch working them together to make a cosy blanket for number two arriving in a few months. so wandering what to do with all these extra squares, i immediately took to google.

adding my own take on the little fellas, i added some lavender to the stuffing - my trademark scent... i am sure i use more lavender than is really necessary!
i think these would make a lovely new baby gift - must remember to post about my home made lavender baby powder that was last years new baby gift!

during my internet trawlings i found so many lovely crafty creations that my next project has to be some amigurumi... but first i have to learn to crochet!

crafty little things

i have been a busy sewing bee again lately... making a new blanket for the little baby in my tummy, out of knitted squares - should be interesting to see how that pans out! its a bit 'different'.  and cross stitching some name plaques for some of poppys little pals -

it is definitely something i love doing and giving, although a lot more practice is needed as my crosses are not as perfect as i would like... but is that not the point of handmade? the fact that you can tell it's hand made? i'll just keep telling myself that, i think! ...i have a few orders waiting too, so they can't be all that bad!?!

so apart from that, i have to get back into poppys 'book' - so far we have photos and keepsakes from birth to about 6 months!! she is now 2 ... so a fair bit of work to do on that! oops!

and a slide-show of images for my mothers 70th ...which was last year ...but better late than never, right?  i make every intention to do these lovely things, but find time just isn't with me on this!

on top of all this we are in the midst of our busiest time at the studio and are pulling late nighters all over the place. i am tired. i fell asleep in front of one of channel 5s afternoon movies yesterday and woke to hear poppy singing away in her cot - who knows how long she'd been awake for! i guess if she'd been up a while i would have known about it... after all she doesn't normally 'beat about the bush' for anything!

mummy badges of honor

children have a sixth sense when spotting mummys, a friend recently told me that, one day, when she went to pick up her little boy from nursery, a group of his friends came running over to her saying 'a mummy, a mummy!'

we must give off some sort of stench... perhaps dried milk/weetabix/yogurt that has been smeared, dropped or thrown at us throughout the day. perhaps its our trouser's worn knees or the dark circles around our eyes. it could even be that we still rock gently from foot to foot while waiting in a queue or standing at the bus stop.  whatever it is, we are pretty easy to spot...

one of my worst moments as a new mum was this -
i had finally managed to get out of the house - keys, change bag, nappies, wipes, pram, 2 wk old baby... check.  i arrived at my very first mother and baby group and although i felt like i was back at my first day of school, i ventured over to join in.  i had a lovely afternoon chatting with all the other new mums (who had all felt the same on their first day out) and showing off my brand new baby girl... i felt great walking home, i mean from day one i had been out and about - mainly as i have to walk the dog every morning but this was like a real achievement.  when i got in i glanced in the mirror... one eye had full makeup and the other, not a bit! and i had a delightful chocolate moustache from my decaf mocha.

tears and more tears

poppy lasted all of twenty minutes at the creche today before i was called to come and get her.  she was in tears and became inconsolable the minute she saw me.
it is so unlike her, she is usually quite the socialite that barely gives mum a second glance in play situations... she is really more a daddy's girl anyway so i am very used to getting the cold shoulder.  (whenever it is just the two of us, she treats me like i am the only person in the world that matters and i know she loves me!)
but even upon seeing her daddy today she clung to me like a limpet and would not leave my side. 
now she wasn't cross with me as she forgave me almost instantly but i feel sad that i broke her trust a little today...

bed time stories and making memories

almost two years ago, i found this lovely ferm cot mobile for my brand new baby and bought it immediately! she still loves it to this day so was worth every penny! the mobile came with it's own little story which is so lovely i thought i would share it here...

once upon at time, there was a little bird that lived in a bird cage.  everyday, the little bird would look out the birdcage and see a huge tree that grew bigger and bigger.  the little bird wanted nothing more than to fly up to the very top of the tree, because the bird was sure that from way up there he would be able to see the whole world.  
next to the tree was a little house and in that house lived a little boy.  one day, the little boy was climbing the tree, when all of a sudden he heard the little bird tweeting from the bird cage.  the little boy waved at the bird and said 'hi little nice bird - i really wish that you could see the amazing view from up here.  i can see the whole world.  
when the boy climbed down the tree he noticed that there was a little key hanging from underneath the bird cage.  the boy took the key and unlocked the door to the bird cage.  as soon as the door opened, the little bird flew out of the cage and straight to the top of the tree.  and just as the little bird had imagined, it could see the whole world from up there.  now the little bird had everything it wanted and it lived happily ever after.

it has long been chewed and destroyed but it remains in my head from night after night when i would read the story to my new born baby staring up at me.

i love those little memories we have... usually both very sleepy after a long feed and staring at each other in the light of the moon, streaming in through our bedroom window.  all very distant now however, as she seems to never stop for a moment. talking and singing, counting and laughing... a non stop little whirlwind of happiness.  making plenty of new memories now.  my not so little girl.

there was another amazing cot mobile that i came across, one so beautiful i still think about it to this very day... like a guilty secret or a 'bit on the side'... maybe for number two? i heart all things klt so will blog more about their fabulous prints at another time... keep your peepers peeled...