Tuesday, 8 September 2015

untucked shirts

my wee baby girl started school this week... well she started a week and a half ago but was only in for half days.  this week she was in for the full day and had to negotiate the lunch hall solo... i can barely believe it. where has those five fast years gone? so much has changed. so much has happened. in the blink of an eye.

there have been no tears.  a tightly held hand and a few lost looks. but no tears. i am not entirely sure if it is a good thing... well, it is. it shows she is confident and independent. it shows that i have prepared her for such a big step.
but i feel a sense of sadness, as if she no longer needs me. as if i have somehow been holding her back all these years when all she really wanted to do was to be out in the big world learning and discovering new things... but that's not true... yes, she is so ready for this. but at the end of a busy day playing with her new friends, she runs to hug me just as she always has... a look of sheer joy in her eyes. she holds my hand so tightly as we walk home, she skips and sings and tells me all about her day...

and so a new chapter begins.